I have been looking on the web for pictures by an early 19th century german artist Caspar David Freidrich. The distance and sense of only a moment in time being seen by the viewer in his pictures has stolen into my soul over the years. He paints moon rises and by moonlight. If a building appears it is only an open window or the stone frame of broken windows that is shown. We see people in the paintings gazing onwards, away from us at things we can't see or at the still moon hanging over them. These pictures are weighted by symbolic thought yet light and light-filled.They are open to the world as it changes in that limnal space/time; open to the possibilities of the night time. That night isn't always dark. They say to me that in this moment, in this present we are on the verge of something, if you could only see....  So here I am - out of work, sick, balancing my chronic health disabilities, waiting, hoping, struggling, wanting to see.... and knowing that it isn't the bright light of day that illuminates my world.

         
 

It goes to trust I think. Can you trust them again.  What were your expectations that were broken?  Were they fair?  You have to re-examine yourself first before you can consider the second chance stuff. Redemption is always possible but the relationship is a new one from that point not the old one re-continued and if you go on while still with the mental reservations of waiting for something else to happen (as can happen because we want to protect ourselves) then are you really present in this relationship?  You have to really communicate with one another this time around. I think my answer is - yes, but, maybe!

I think we can't help it. We live in a world that is all about 'the gaze' and so we have to have someone to look at.  Is it bread and circuses - distracting us from our mundane lives? Is that a bad thing?  May be the truth is it is human to be shallow...  I do hate the 'heroizing' of sports stars though.